More Funny Jokes
Introduction:
Thanks To All The Supporters Of My First Jokes, And Especially To The Ones Who Encouraged Me To Write More đ Enjoy đ
1.) What do you call a 90-year old man that can still madturbate?
A.) Miracle whip!
2.)Why donât witches wear panties when flying?
A.) To get a better grip on the broomstick!
3.)Whatâs the quickest way to clear out a mens restroom?
A.) Say âNice Dickâ.
4.)Whatâs the definition of âskyjackingâ?
A.) A hand job at 32,000 feet
5.)Whatâs white, sticky, and falls from the sky?
A.)The cumming of the Lord
6.)Have you heard about the new, âmint-flavoured birth control pillâ that women can take just before having sex?
A.) Theyâre called âPredickamintsâ.
7.)Why do dwarfs laugh when theyâre playing football?
A.)Because the grass tickles their balls!
8.)Why donât blind men skydive?
A.)Because it scares the shit out of the dog!
9.)How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A.)He forgot to wrap his whopper!
10.)How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
A.)Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from!
11.)Why doesnât a chicken wear pants?
A.)Because his pecker is on his head!
12.)Why are women like KFC?
A.)After youâve finished with the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in!
13.)Why does Santa have such a big sack?
A.)Beacause he only comes once a year.
14.)What happens if you put the Energizer bunnyâs batteries in backwards?
A.)He keeps coming, and coming, and coming!
15.)What starts with âFâ, ends in âKâ, ane means ALOT of excitement?
A.)If you thought that the answer was âFuckâ, Then boy, you have a sick mind⊠because the answer isâŠ
FIRETEUCK!!
16.)Whatâs a zebra?
A.)26 Sizes bigger than an âAâ bra!
A.) Miracle whip!
2.)Why donât witches wear panties when flying?
A.) To get a better grip on the broomstick!
3.)Whatâs the quickest way to clear out a mens restroom?
A.) Say âNice Dickâ.
4.)Whatâs the definition of âskyjackingâ?
A.) A hand job at 32,000 feet
5.)Whatâs white, sticky, and falls from the sky?
A.)The cumming of the Lord
6.)Have you heard about the new, âmint-flavoured birth control pillâ that women can take just before having sex?
A.) Theyâre called âPredickamintsâ.
7.)Why do dwarfs laugh when theyâre playing football?
A.)Because the grass tickles their balls!
8.)Why donât blind men skydive?
A.)Because it scares the shit out of the dog!
9.)How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A.)He forgot to wrap his whopper!
10.)How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
A.)Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from!
11.)Why doesnât a chicken wear pants?
A.)Because his pecker is on his head!
12.)Why are women like KFC?
A.)After youâve finished with the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in!
13.)Why does Santa have such a big sack?
A.)Beacause he only comes once a year.
14.)What happens if you put the Energizer bunnyâs batteries in backwards?
A.)He keeps coming, and coming, and coming!
15.)What starts with âFâ, ends in âKâ, ane means ALOT of excitement?
A.)If you thought that the answer was âFuckâ, Then boy, you have a sick mind⊠because the answer isâŠ
FIRETEUCK!!
16.)Whatâs a zebra?
A.)26 Sizes bigger than an âAâ bra!
Some Blonde Jokes:
(No offence is meant to any Blondes reading, I used to be a blonde though!)
B1.)How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
A.)Write âPlease Turn Overâ on both sides of a piece of paper
B2.)How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?
A.)Knock on the door
B3.)Why did the blonde have square boobs?
A.)Because she forgot to take the tissues out of the box!
